At one point, I sat down and made a list of certain properties that I'd want in
an ideal mate. I tried to include most of the reasons why my previous
relationships went bad in making the list; live and learn and all
that.
Openminded
Accepting of me & my quirks
Strong desire for adventure
Some knowledge/belief in the metaphysical or a desire to learn
Willingness to leave stuff behind/detachment
Some form of libido
Desire to learn/grow/better onesself
Not too dependent on wanting kids
Sincere/truthful, even if it hurts
Compassionate/empathetic
Since this point I have realized that I do not need a mate in order to be happy, and am subsisting in a sort of polyamorous situation with my closest friends. There isn't as much need and dependance with friends alone, no guilt tripping or emotional manipulation to try to get the other person to see or do things your way. I still have love, sex, and good company, so overall I consider it a net gain, "hedonistic" or not.
